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00014 char *start[] =
00015 { "You", "1", "5", ".", "May", "13", ".", "With", "the", "19", "of", "18",
00016 ",", "may", "13", "."
00017 };
00018 char startLoc[] = { 3, 0, 4, 7, 16 };
00019 char *adj[] = { "3", "4", "2", ",", "1" };
00020 char adjLoc[] = { 3, 0, 1, 2, 5 };
00021 char *adj3[] = { "3", "4" };
00022 char adj3Loc[] = { 2, 0, 1, 2 };
00023 char *adj1[] =
00024 { "lame", "dried", "up", "par-broiled", "bloated", "half-baked", "spiteful",
00025 "egotistical", "ungrateful", "stupid", "moronic", "fat", "ugly", "puny", "pitiful",
00026 "insignificant", "blithering", "repulsive", "worthless", "blundering", "retarded",
00027 "useless", "obnoxious", "low-budget", "assinine", "neurotic", "subhuman", "crochety",
00028 "indescribable", "contemptible", "unspeakable", "sick", "lazy", "good-for-nothing",
00029 "slutty", "mentally-deficient", "creepy", "sloppy", "dismal", "pompous", "pathetic",
00030 "friendless", "revolting", "slovenly", "cantankerous", "uncultured", "insufferable",
00031 "gross", "unkempt", "defective", "crumby"
00032 };
00033 char adj1Loc[] =
00034 { 50, 0, 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20,
00035 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42,
00036 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51 };
00037 char *adj2[] =
00038 { "putrefied", "festering", "funky", "moldy", "leprous", "curdled", "fetid",
00039 "slimy", "crusty", "sweaty", "damp", "deranged", "smelly", "stenchy", "malignant",
00040 "noxious", "grimy", "reeky", "nasty", "mutilated", "sloppy", "gruesome", "grisly",
00041 "sloshy", "wormy", "mealy", "spoiled", "contaminated", "rancid", "musty",
00042 "fly-covered", "moth-eaten", "decaying", "decomposed", "freeze-dried", "defective",
00043 "petrified", "rotting", "scabrous", "hirsute"
00044 };
00045 char adj2Loc[] =
00046 { 40, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19,
00047 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40 };
00048 char *name[] =
00049 { "10", ",", "bad", "excuse", "for", "6", ",", "6", "for", "brains", ",",
00050 "4", "11", "8", "for", "brains", "offspring", "of", "a", "motherless", "10", "7", "6",
00051 "7", "4", "11", "8"
00052 };
00053 char nameLoc[] = { 7, 0, 1, 6, 10, 16, 21, 23, 27 };
00054 char *stuff[] =
00055 { "shit", "toe", "jam", "filth", "puss", "earwax", "leaf", "clippings",
00056 "bat", "guano", "mucus", "fungus", "mung", "refuse", "earwax", "spittoon", "spittle",
00057 "phlegm"
00058 };
00059 char stuffLoc[] = { 14, 0, 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17, 18 };
00060 char *noun_and_prep[] =
00061 { "bit", "of", "piece", "of", "vat", "of", "lump", "of", "crock", "of",
00062 "ball", "of", "tub", "of", "load", "of", "bucket", "of", "mound", "of", "glob", "of", "bag",
00063 "of", "heap", "of", "mountain", "of", "load", "of", "barrel", "of", "sack", "of", "blob", "of",
00064 "pile", "of", "truckload", "of", "vat", "of"
00065 };
00066 char noun_and_prepLoc[] =
00067 { 21, 0, 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 22, 24, 26, 28, 30, 32, 34, 36,
00068 38, 40, 42 };
00069 char *organics[] =
00070 { "droppings", "mung", "zits", "puckies", "tumors", "cysts", "tumors",
00071 "livers", "froth", "parts", "scabs", "guts", "entrails", "blubber", "carcuses", "gizards",
00072 "9"
00073 };
00074 char organicsLoc[] =
00075 { 17, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17 };
00076 char *body_parts[] =
00077 { "kidneys", "genitals", "buttocks", "earlobes", "innards", "feet"
00078 };
00079 char body_partsLoc[] = { 6, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 };
00080 char *noun[] =
00081 { "pop", "tart", "warthog", "twinkie", "barnacle", "fondue", "pot",
00082 "cretin", "fuckwad", "moron", "ass", "neanderthal", "nincompoop", "simpleton", "11"
00083 };
00084 char nounLoc[] = { 13, 0, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 };
00085 char *animal[] =
00086 { "donkey", "llama", "dingo", "lizard", "gekko", "lemur", "moose", "camel",
00087 "goat", "eel"
00088 };
00089 char animalLoc[] = { 10, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 };
00090 char *good_verb[] =
00091 { "love", "cuddle", "fondle", "adore", "smooch", "hug", "caress", "worship",
00092 "look", "at", "touch"
00093 };
00094 char good_verbLoc[] = { 10, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 10, 11 };
00095 char *curse[] =
00096 { "14", "20", "23", "14", "17", "20", "23", "14", "find", "your", "9",
00097 "suddenly", "delectable", "14", "and", "14", "seek", "a", "battleground", "23"
00098 };
00099 char curseLoc[] = { 4, 0, 3, 7, 13, 20 };
00100 char *afflictors[] =
00101 { "15", "21", "15", "21", "15", "21", "15", "21", "a", "22", "Rush",
00102 "Limbaugh", "the", "hosts", "of", "Hades"
00103 };
00104 char afflictorsLoc[] = { 6, 0, 2, 4, 6, 8, 12, 16 };
00105 char *quantity[] =
00106 { "a", "4", "hoard", "of", "a", "4", "pack", "of", "a", "truckload", "of",
00107 "a", "swarm", "of", "many", "an", "army", "of", "a", "4", "heard", "of", "a", "4",
00108 "platoon", "of", "a", "4", "and", "4", "group", "of", "16"
00109 };
00110 char quantityLoc[] = { 10, 0, 4, 8, 11, 14, 15, 18, 22, 26, 32, 33 };
00111 char *numbers[] =
00112 { "a", "thousand", "three", "million", "ninty-nine", "nine-hundred,",
00113 "ninty-nine", "forty-two", "a", "gazillion", "sixty-eight", "times", "thirty-three"
00114 };
00115 char numbersLoc[] = { 7, 0, 2, 4, 5, 7, 8, 10, 13 };
00116 char *adv[] =
00117 { "viciously", "manicly", "merrily", "happily", ",", "with", "the", "19",
00118 "of", "18", ",", "gleefully", ",", "with", "much", "ritualistic", "celebration", ",",
00119 "franticly"
00120 };
00121 char advLoc[] = { 8, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 11, 12, 18, 19 };
00122 char *metaphor[] =
00123 { "an", "irate", "manticore", "Thor's", "belch", "Alah's", "fist", "16",
00124 "titans", "a", "particularly", "vicious", "she-bear", "in", "the", "midst", "of", "her",
00125 "menstrual", "cycle", "a", "pissed-off", "Jabberwock"
00126 };
00127 char metaphorLoc[] = { 6, 0, 3, 5, 7, 9, 20, 23 };
00128 char *force[] = { "force", "fury", "power", "rage" };
00129 char forceLoc[] = { 4, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4 };
00130 char *bad_action[] =
00131 { "spit", "shimmy", "slobber", "find", "refuge", "find", "shelter", "dance",
00132 "retch", "vomit", "defecate", "erect", "a", "strip", "mall", "build", "a", "26", "have", "a",
00133 "religious", "experience", "discharge", "bodily", "waste", "fart", "dance", "drool",
00134 "lambada", "spill", "16", "rusty", "tacks", "bite", "you", "sneeze", "sing", "16",
00135 "campfire", "songs", "smite", "you", "16", "times", "construct", "a", "new", "home", "throw",
00136 "a", "party", "procreate"
00137 };
00138 char bad_actionLoc[] =
00139 { 25, 0, 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 15, 18, 22, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 33,
00140 35, 36, 40, 44, 48, 51, 52 };
00141 char *beasties[] =
00142 { "yaks", "22", "maggots", "22", "cockroaches", "stinging", "scorpions",
00143 "fleas", "22", "weasels", "22", "gnats", "South", "American", "killer", "bees", "spiders",
00144 "4", "monkeys", "22", "wiener-dogs", "22", "rats", "22", "wolverines", "4", ",", "22",
00145 "pit-fiends"
00146 };
00147 char beastiesLoc[] =
00148 { 14, 0, 1, 3, 5, 7, 8, 10, 12, 16, 17, 19, 21, 23, 25, 29 };
00149 char *condition[] =
00150 { "frothing", "manic", "crazed", "plague-ridden", "disease-carrying",
00151 "biting", "rabid", "blood-thirsty", "ravaging", "slavering"
00152 };
00153 char conditionLoc[] = { 10, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 };
00154 char *place[] =
00155 { "in", "24", "25", "upon", "your", "mother's", "grave", "on", "24", "best",
00156 "rug", "in", "the", "26", "you", "call", "home", "upon", "your", "heinie"
00157 };
00158 char placeLoc[] = { 5, 0, 3, 7, 11, 17, 20 };
00159 char *relation[] =
00160 { "your", "your", "your", "your", "father's", "your", "mother's", "your",
00161 "grandma's"
00162 };
00163 char relationLoc[] = { 6, 0, 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 9 };
00164 char *in_something[] =
00165 { "entrails", "anal", "cavity", "shoes", "house", "pantry", "general",
00166 "direction", "pants", "bed"
00167 };
00168 char in_somethingLoc[] = { 8, 0, 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9, 10 };
00169 char *bad_place[] =
00170 { "rat", "hole", "sewer", "toxic", "dump", "oil", "refinery", "landfill",
00171 "porto-pottie"
00172 };
00173 char bad_placeLoc[] = { 6, 0, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9 };
00174 char **daGrammar[27];
00175 char *daGLoc[27];
00176
00177 static void
00178 init_grammar (void)
00179 {
00180 daGrammar[0] = start;
00181 daGLoc[0] = startLoc;
00182 daGrammar[1] = adj;
00183 daGLoc[1] = adjLoc;
00184 daGrammar[2] = adj3;
00185 daGLoc[2] = adj3Loc;
00186 daGrammar[3] = adj1;
00187 daGLoc[3] = adj1Loc;
00188 daGrammar[4] = adj2;
00189 daGLoc[4] = adj2Loc;
00190 daGrammar[5] = name;
00191 daGLoc[5] = nameLoc;
00192 daGrammar[6] = stuff;
00193 daGLoc[6] = stuffLoc;
00194 daGrammar[7] = noun_and_prep;
00195 daGLoc[7] = noun_and_prepLoc;
00196 daGrammar[8] = organics;
00197 daGLoc[8] = organicsLoc;
00198 daGrammar[9] = body_parts;
00199 daGLoc[9] = body_partsLoc;
00200 daGrammar[10] = noun;
00201 daGLoc[10] = nounLoc;
00202 daGrammar[11] = animal;
00203 daGLoc[11] = animalLoc;
00204 daGrammar[12] = good_verb;
00205 daGLoc[12] = good_verbLoc;
00206 daGrammar[13] = curse;
00207 daGLoc[13] = curseLoc;
00208 daGrammar[14] = afflictors;
00209 daGLoc[14] = afflictorsLoc;
00210 daGrammar[15] = quantity;
00211 daGLoc[15] = quantityLoc;
00212 daGrammar[16] = numbers;
00213 daGLoc[16] = numbersLoc;
00214 daGrammar[17] = adv;
00215 daGLoc[17] = advLoc;
00216 daGrammar[18] = metaphor;
00217 daGLoc[18] = metaphorLoc;
00218 daGrammar[19] = force;
00219 daGLoc[19] = forceLoc;
00220 daGrammar[20] = bad_action;
00221 daGLoc[20] = bad_actionLoc;
00222 daGrammar[21] = beasties;
00223 daGLoc[21] = beastiesLoc;
00224 daGrammar[22] = condition;
00225 daGLoc[22] = conditionLoc;
00226 daGrammar[23] = place;
00227 daGLoc[23] = placeLoc;
00228 daGrammar[24] = relation;
00229 daGLoc[24] = relationLoc;
00230 daGrammar[25] = in_something;
00231 daGLoc[25] = in_somethingLoc;
00232 daGrammar[26] = bad_place;
00233 daGLoc[26] = bad_placeLoc;
00234 }
00235
00236 #include <ctype.h>
00237 #include <debug.h>
00238 #include <random.h>
00239 #include <stdio.h>
00240 #include <stdlib.h>
00241 #include <string.h>
00242 #include <syscall.h>
00243
00244 void expand (int num, char **grammar[], char *location[], int handle);
00245
00246 static void
00247 usage (int ret_code, const char *message, ...) PRINTF_FORMAT (2, 3);
00248
00249 static void
00250 usage (int ret_code, const char *message, ...)
00251 {
00252 va_list args;
00253
00254 if (message != NULL)
00255 {
00256 va_start (args, message);
00257 vprintf (message, args);
00258 va_end (args);
00259 }
00260
00261 printf ("\n"
00262 "Usage: insult [OPTION]...\n"
00263 "Prints random insults to screen.\n\n"
00264 " -h: this help message\n"
00265 " -s <integer>: set the random seed (default 4951)\n"
00266 " -n <integer>: choose number of insults (default 4)\n"
00267 " -f <file>: redirect output to <file>\n");
00268
00269 exit (ret_code);
00270 }
00271
00272 int
00273 main (int argc, char *argv[])
00274 {
00275 int sentence_cnt, new_seed, i, file_flag, sent_flag, seed_flag;
00276 int handle;
00277
00278 new_seed = 4951;
00279 sentence_cnt = 4;
00280 file_flag = 0;
00281 seed_flag = 0;
00282 sent_flag = 0;
00283 handle = STDOUT_FILENO;
00284
00285 for (i = 1; i < argc; i++)
00286 {
00287 if (strcmp (argv[1], "-h") == 0)
00288 usage (0, NULL);
00289 else if (strcmp (argv[i], "-s") == 0)
00290 {
00291 if (seed_flag++)
00292 usage (-1, "Can't have more than one seed");
00293 if (++i >= argc)
00294 usage (-1, "Missing value for -s");
00295 new_seed = atoi (argv[i]);
00296 }
00297 else if (strcmp (argv[i], "-n") == 0)
00298 {
00299 if (sent_flag++)
00300 usage (-1, "Can't have more than one sentence option");
00301 if (++i >= argc)
00302 usage (-1, "Missing value for -n");
00303 sentence_cnt = atoi (argv[i]);
00304 if (sentence_cnt < 1)
00305 usage (-1, "Must have at least one sentence");
00306 }
00307 else if (strcmp (argv[i], "-f") == 0)
00308 {
00309 if (file_flag++)
00310 usage (-1, "Can't have more than one output file");
00311 if (++i >= argc)
00312 usage (-1, "Missing value for -f");
00313
00314
00315
00316
00317
00318 create (argv[i], 0);
00319 handle = open (argv[i]);
00320 if (handle < 0)
00321 {
00322 printf ("%s: open failed\n", argv[i]);
00323 return EXIT_FAILURE;
00324 }
00325 }
00326 else
00327 usage (-1, "Unrecognized flag");
00328 }
00329
00330 init_grammar ();
00331
00332 random_init (new_seed);
00333 hprintf (handle, "\n");
00334
00335 for (i = 0; i < sentence_cnt; i++)
00336 {
00337 hprintf (handle, "\n");
00338 expand (0, daGrammar, daGLoc, handle);
00339 hprintf (handle, "\n\n");
00340 }
00341
00342 if (file_flag)
00343 close (handle);
00344
00345 return EXIT_SUCCESS;
00346 }
00347
00348 void
00349 expand (int num, char **grammar[], char *location[], int handle)
00350 {
00351 char *word;
00352 int i, which, listStart, listEnd;
00353
00354 which = random_ulong () % location[num][0] + 1;
00355 listStart = location[num][which];
00356 listEnd = location[num][which + 1];
00357 for (i = listStart; i < listEnd; i++)
00358 {
00359 word = grammar[num][i];
00360 if (!isdigit (*word))
00361 {
00362 if (!ispunct (*word))
00363 hprintf (handle, " ");
00364 hprintf (handle, "%s", word);
00365 }
00366 else
00367 expand (atoi (word), grammar, location, handle);
00368 }
00369
00370 }
